Movie Saturday

As there was nothing else to do on a Saturday, after waking up at 12 noon and eating brunch afterwards, the whole day was spent on the couch watching DVDs of various films.

SPREAD


SPREAD is a fresh, funny, and racy look at the trials and tribulations of sleeping your way to a life of privilege in Los Angeles. Comic and karmic, the film is an “immorality tale” about a gorgeous guy who gives women what they want in order to live exactly as he likes. In SPREAD, Nikki (Ashton Kutcher) isn’t a gigolo. He’s a sexual grifter, a fun-loving, freeloading hipster who understands his greatest assets are his looks and sexual prowess, which he uses to charm his way into the hearts of the city’s richest women and enjoy their lifestyle. Nikki gets a free place to live, fantastic gifts, A- list access, and plenty of sex. The women get to feel young, beautiful… and utterly fulfilled in the bedroom. It’s a mutually beneficial set-up. Nikki’s latest conquest is Samantha (Anne Heche), a stunning middle- aged lawyer who gives him more than he’s ever had before. But then he meets a gorgeous waitress his own age named Heather (Margarita Levieva). She comes to visit Nikki at Samantha’s house while Samantha is out of town, sees what an incredible place it is… and comes to the mistaken conclusion it’s his. Unbeknownst to Nikki, Heather lives by playing the same game. When Samantha comes home, she discovers Nikki’s infidelity and he’s put out on the street. With nowhere else to turn, Nikki pulls out all the stops to win Heather over and they begin to form their own kind of bond. Sexually charged by a game of one-upsmanship, each shows the other their best grifts, and they unexpectedly begin falling in love – the one thing they can’t do in the life they lead. Soon, the truth of their unfolding relationship forces a choice between love and money, and Nikki has to decide whether he can live on his own once and for all in the hopes of finding something real.

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

Celebrity photographer Connor Mead loves freedom, fun and women…in that order. A committed bachelor who thinks nothing of breaking up with multiple women on a conference call, Connor’s mockery of romance proves a real buzz-kill for his kid brother, Paul, and a houseful of well wishers on the eve of Paul’s wedding. Just when it looks like Connor may single-handedly ruin the wedding, he is visited by the ghosts of his former jilted girlfriends, who take him on a revealing and hilarious odyssey through his failed relationships-past, present and future. Together they attempt to find out what turned Connor into such an insensitive jerk and whether there is still hope for him to find true love…or if he really is the lost cause everyone thinks he is.

Up in the Air

George Clooney stars as Ryan Bingham, a corporate hatchet man who loves his life on the road but is forced to fight for his job when his company downsizes its travel budget. He is required to spend more time at home just as he is on the cusp of a goal he's worked toward for years: reaching five million frequent flyer miles and just after he's met the frequent-traveler woman of his dreams.

Drowning in a Big Pool of Sh*t

When it rains, it pours. This has been a cliche for God knows how long but still it rings truer every time. How come when one problem arrives, a series is usually in tow?

You get buried underneath until there's no room to breathe. Then you drown slowly, painfully, gasping for breath, trying to reach to anyone who could rescue you. But sometimes, there just isn't anyone. You're on your own.

Then you get to choose. You'll have an option to struggle with all your strength, with all your courage, to paddle hardly just to resurface upwards, to be able to fill your lungs with air.

Or you choose to stop struggling, to just simply lay still, to let the numbness take away your soul. To be able not to feel pain anymore. To calmly welcome the coming oblivion, the promise of nothingness.

When you're in the middle of that pool, the only thing that matters is your choice.

Deadly

I was thinking if I'm running late. I'm meeting Mara at Deli John's for a brunch and I left my phone at home and didn't wear a watch. I wonder what time is it already. I woke up just in time but got held up a bit at the train station. Maybe I'm still on time.

Mara and I are friends since first grade. We were both wearing braces then and looked almost identical. Many people has mistaken us for twins. We went to school together until high school and was only forced to separate during college. She decided to take a course in Mass Communications while I pursue a teaching course. However, I wasn't able to finish my studies because I got pregnant at eighteen and the father of my child did not want any responsibilities so I was forced to work to raise my child.

I worked shifts at three different jobs just to support my child and to pay the bills. I never opted to ask for my parents though they are willing to support their grandchild. The only thing they insisted on was the apartment for us because they wanted their grandchild to have a decent place to live in. I feel tired most of the time but I never compromise my time with my daughter. Katie is such a sweet child and she's all I have in the world. All my problems all go away whenever we were together.

But I still feel something in my life is missing. Not a lover because I have a number of suitors but I just feel like I'm not yet ready for any of them. What I really wanted was to continue my studies and put up my own kindergarten school. Then I won't have to work three jobs and I'll have more time with Katie. Whenever I thought of this, I thought of Mara. She's what I have dreamed to be. Successful in her career, being the producer of a lot of shows in the biggest television network in the country.

She travels to any place she wanted. I remember that it was both our dreams to travel together and explore different places. But I could not do that now. Mara, however, lived her dreams, our dreams. She's smart and beautiful and very successful. She lives in a large manor in the most exclusive subdivision in the city. She owns several cars and countless properties all over the country and even in some other parts of the world. Everybody loves her and she was once married but the marriage didn't work out well and so they divorced. But still, she exudes an aura of extreme happiness with her success.

I was already in front of the deli and I saw Mara already seated inside from the large glass walls of the restaurant. I smiled at her and she smiled back. She was as immaculate as ever now with a bob cut which made me think of Victoria Beckham. I already knew that whatever hairstyle or outfit she sported, Mara will still be able to carry it with style and grace. I started towards the entrance of the restaurant but stopped when I heard someone call my name. I instantly caught sight of someone familiar. Ellie waved and ran towards me. I glanced back at Mara with a plea on my face and with sign language asked her to spare me some minutes while I talked to Ellie.

***

Carrie looks exactly the same as I had remembered her. We haven't seen each other for almost a year but she still wears the same shoulder-length wavy hair in auburn. I saw some stress lines on her face when she smiled at me but she still looks gorgeous yet simple. No one would think that she already has a six-year old daughter. At that thought, I can't help but feel pain.

When Carrie got pregnant, she was so scared that she wanted an abortion especially when Brad left her on her own. But I advised her not to and that she would be able to make it. Though she was not able to finish school because she had to work for her child, I felt that she became stronger after giving birth to Katie. She became the source of her strength and even if she worked several jobs, I knew she feels satisfied whenever she sees her daughter growing up lovely and smart.

I offered her financial help several times but as strong as she was, she always refuses and I admire her for exceptional strength and bravery. It was that strength that I fear I do not possess. Everyone thinks I am strong as successful as I am, little did they know that I was never whole.

I grew up in a broken home, my mom left us for a younger man and my dad started drinking until he suffered from liver cancer. He died after a few months of being diagnosed and so I was left alone since I was fifteen. Though I was left with enough money to finish school, I persevere in my chosen career to mask the emptiness I felt inside. With this I became indeed successful.

Then I met Willard in one of my leisurely travels. We dated for a few months and got married in the same year. For a while I thought I was the happiest woman on earth, with all my career success and a wonderful husband. But only a few months after we got married, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and so I had a major hysterectomy. This could only mean one thing, that I will not be able to bear a child. Before we got married, Willard and I agreed to have several children since we were both the only child. The operation has changed everything. Though he supported me during the operation and throughout my recovery, after a while, I was seeing less and less of him.

Willard has various businesses in and out of the country and he was out of the country more often. I tried to understand this at first until he came home with apparently grave news. He wanted divorce. He said he cannot have a wife who cannot bear his children. I plead and told him we can find alternative solutions. But I felt that a bomb was dropped in my head when he told me he got someone pregnant.

All of these I have hidden from Carrie. Though she is my bestfriend, I could not bear the look of sympathy from her eyes. I told her that Willard had an affair so I decided to end it and it was what we both agreed to tell the world. He gave me that piece of self-pride so as not to completely humiliate me.

Whenever I look at Carrie and Katie, I could not help but feel the life I would have had. It was that one thing that made me empty once again, that took everything away from me. And now I see Carrie entering the deli, tired but contented having a child whom she loved and who loves her back.

***

The road was quite slippery this morning because the snow has slowly melted and it was drizzling the whole morning. I know I have to be more careful but I drove with speed because I was running late for a date. I know it was weird to have a lunch date but I should grab this opportunity. Allen and I met at a common friend's party two months ago. Since I met him, I had always looked forward to attending gatherings prepared by Bill just to see Allen again. I was unfortunate for a couple of parties but during the last one, I directly told Bill that I liked Allen and wanted to see him again.

But he was out of the country often, having relocated in Milan to attend to his several furniture shop businesses. However, he promised me that he would set Allen a date with me when he comes back. And this has been my lucky morning.

I dressed up and carefully prepared for our meeting. He will only be here for a few hours and I had to grab my chance. It took me longer than usual to dress up careful not to be overdressed yet I still wanted an impression. Before I knew it, I was running late so the option to take the train was out as the stations are always full at around lunch time.

Seeing the Deli John's from a block away, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was just in time, checking my watch. I chanced a glance at my reflection in the rear view mirror to check if I hadn't smudged my lipstick and if my hair is still in place from under my carefully matched beret.

But everything else happened in a flash as I stole a second to view the mirror.

***

I decided to grab a sandwich from Burger Joe's in front of Deli John's. It was already eleven o'clock but I knew I won't be able to have a decent lunch with all the workload that I just received with everything marked as "rush". I knew from the moment I saw the pile stacked on my table that it will be a working lunch. Again.

Working as Dana's personal assistant feels like sitting in hell next to Satan. When I started at Derby's Unlimited, I thought that I was the luckiest person to have been chosen by Dana Derby. Only after a few days that I realized I was gravely mistaken. I have to answer phone calls that seems to come in every minute. I had to type reports, prepare presentations, audit the sheets and bring Dana coffee every thirty minutes. To top it all off, Dana is the kind of boss that never compliments and tries to scrutinize your work for every little mistake that you might have committed.

I felt like quitting after a month but decided I needed the job anyway. The pay was good and more than enough for me though I just have to endure Dana's scowls and insults and yells every single day. Well, I thought that the pay compliments that little self-respect that was taken away from me.

I thought of ordering a nice take away from Deli John's but I didn't have much time to spare so I settled for a double cheeseburger and a coke at Burger Joe's instead. I took my food and had just opened the fastfood's glass door when I saw a speeding Nissan X-terra from the next block which swerved wildly to avoid a passing couple. The driver violently turned the wheel to the right where Deli John's stood from the corner of the street.

The driver probably already lost control of the vehicle as the car hit a lampost and skidded straight to the restaurant's glass walls. I just caught a glance of two women sitting opposite each other who both turned their heads towards the crashing car with utmost terror on their faces.

The Holidays

The Christmas and New Year celebrations didn't come out sad after all. On the morning of the 24th, we were all very busy preparing for the evening's Noche Buena. We had lots of food because we designated each and everyone to cook or prepare a little something and so we had 10 different dishes on the table. It was a simple Christmas dinner and some videoke afterwards.
On Christmas day itself, the rest of our friends arrived in the house at around 7pm for a simple Christmas party hosted by Toni and Don. We had several parlor games and it was a fun party complete with exchanging gifts. We planned to watch Avatar after the party but the theaters were all fully booked already. So they just all headed home happy and contented with our simple Christmas celebration.
On New Year's Eve, we had the same setup as Christmas, everyone prepared his or her own food. As usual, we prepared from morning til almost midnight. This time though, some friends joined us in the celebration. We also had fun as we tried to play "charades". We stayed awake until 4am because we had to go to Bapa Edie's place to celebrate there too.
At around 11am on New Year's day, I got a call from Haidee telling us that they are coming. As we have invited them, we got up to prepare the "leftovers". Later, Toni and the rest of the others arrived too and had lunch. After eating, We played another charades game and it was really a lot of fun. It was girls vs. boys and a mobile load was given as a prize. Luckily, we won.
They stayed until twilight after coaxing Karl to cook Arozcaldo and they surprisingly cleaned up the entire cauldron.
I also had my haircut. It was the first time in years to have my hair cut this short and to top it all, I have bangs! But I am not too happy about it. It just feels better to have a "new look" on New Year.

2009: A Look Back on the All-time Low

Yes, it's the end. While we are all hoping and praying for a better and brighter 2010, let's take a look back on 2009. I felt like I was on top of the world, not in its true sense and feeling, but like a god watching over everyone, replaying the past year in my mind.

Overall, I considered 2009 an all-time low. The start of the year was marred by the global financial crisis, with world-wide unemployment, bankruptcy, and instability everywhere that we have lived the year continuously tightening our belts. Then came a sort of "epidemic", the H1N1 virus that has affected hundreds of thousands worldwide. We have also lost several well-known names of the day, the King of Pop Michael Jackson, on top of the list.

And as if we weren't struggling enough just to be able to continue to survive, the Philippines was struck by several calamities, killer typhoons which killed numerous people and left thousand others homeless. There were massive barbaric killings that placed the country in the global headlines. 2009 was about to end and still, a volcano was threatening to explode and several thousands more were to spend Christmas in evacuation centers.

We now welcome 2010, filled with fervent hopes that it will promise a better and brighter days for everyone. Though the past year has been an absolute turmoil, we have to face the coming year with smiles in our hearts and pray that all our lucks will turn and finally favor us.

Great Expectations

When you've had great expectations, you start to think of a lot of possibilities. You imagine things you would want to happen, what you want to be. You dream about things and continuously think about it, how you would feel. But what happens when those expectations were not met? What happens when all those dreams burst out like bubbles?

Denial
It was the first thing I ever felt. Could there be some mistake? Was there some erroneous event that occurred? Were my eyes blinding me? For a moment, I paused and thought that it could not be true. Yet, eventually the truth sinks in and you start to feel other emotions.

Disappointment
When I have finally convinced myself that I am staring truth in the face, I felt disappointment. I felt disappointed that all my efforts have not been fruitful. I felt disappointed that a lot of people have counted on me and I felt that I have let them down. I felt disappointed feeling it was not worth it.

Regrets
Luckily, I didn't feel any regrets. I did not regret that I have not exerted more effort to achieve my desired outcome. I didn't have regrets for not spending more of my attention and time. I didn't feel any regrets that I have not given my best.

Acceptance
After some time and thoughts vent out on the negatives, I finally decided it was time to let go. There was no point in crying over spilled milk. The worst is over and done.

Moving On
I have to move on. There is no turning back. I have to face what lies ahead. There are many lessons learned here. And one thing that keeps a smile on my face is the fact that I bravely did it. Without anything on my sleeves but guts and faith, I have ran through the battle. I may have lost, but I was alive and ready to face more battles in the future.

The Blind Side

Teenager Michael Oher (Quinton Aaron) is surviving on his own, virtually homeless, when he is spotted on the street by Leigh Anne Tuohy (Sandra Bullock). Learning that the young man is one of her daughter's classmates, Leigh Anne insists that Michael—wearing shorts and a t-shirt in the dead of winter—come out of the cold. Without a moment's hesitation, she invites him to stay at the Tuohy home for the night. What starts out as a gesture of kindness turns into something more as Michael becomes part of the Tuohy family despite the differences in their backgrounds.

Living in his new environment, the teen faces a completely different set of challenges to overcome. And as the family helps Michael fulfill his potential, both on and off the football field, Michael's presence in the Tuohys' lives leads them to some insightful self-discoveries of their own.

Based on the best-selling novel by Michael Lewis, "The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game."

I really loved this movie, it has deeply touched my heart. It is one of those stories which gives inspiration and hope to everyone who sees it. No wonder the movie grabbed the top spot on the box office from Twilight Saga: New Moon. Though I don't particularly criticize New Moon, as I'm also a fanatic of Twilight Saga, I don't doubt that The Blind Side has more meat and value and truly inspiring family movie. It's a movie you would never tire of repeating over and over.

http://www.theblindsidemovie.com/

This Sh*t Called Life

Life is so hard. Sometimes you just feel you've had enough. Sometimes you feel like not wanting to wake up. Everything hurts. Everywhere are problems. Sometimes you feel like all the weight of the world is upon your shoulders. And you have no strength to carry on. Sometimes you just wish it would all end. There is no escape. How to go on?

Sometimes it feels like you are awake but feel dead on the inside. Sometimes you feel that your body is nothing but an empty shell. You laugh, you go along with your everyday life, but deep inside you are torn apart. How to will you heal?

Sometimes you feel like the world is playing a painful joke on you. Sometimes you wonder why everyone around you seems fine and you are not. Sometimes you just wish it would all stop. So you will stop hurting. How will it stop?

Sometimes you think that you will not have to think at all...

Catching Up

There are a lot of things that I wanted to blog about these past few weeks but I haven't got time to do so and so here I am to do a little catching up. Firstly, I was finally able to announce to the whole world that I am becoming a mom and I was overwhelmed by the raining congratulations and greetings.

Then I was busy during the last weeks of November since my exams are fast approaching. Though I didn't force myself to study too hard, even if I had, I won't be able to. I went to Abu Dhabi on December 1 and before that, we had some holidays. On November 27, we went to Oman to go fishing. It was a long and tiring day eventhough I didn't fish myself. The next couple of days were devoted to cd burning. I took the side job from Karl and finished the day before my scheduled departure for Abu Dhabi.

On December 1, I drove all the way to Abu Dhabi. I was so amazed with myself that I was able to do it without any hassles. The registration for the exam was mostly waiting and walking and by the time we went to the hotel I was too exhausted. I took a quick nap and ate dinner afterwards. Then we tried to peruse our notes.

I didn't know if it was nerves or what but I didn't sleep well that night. The day of the exam arrived. I woke up at five in the morning and prepared. We just walked our way to the school and waited for the examiners. I was astonished and relieved that the day just went by like that. I was finally halfway through the entire exams.

The second and final day of the exam went smoothly as the first. I was one of the firsts to finish at three in the afternoon. At around four, I was driving back home. It was not quite a long drive but exhaustion finally overtook me when I reached home.

I stayed at home for the rest of the weekend until I finally went back to work on the 7th of December.

Weekenders

http://www.timeoutdubai.com/gallery/11386-360-weekend-pics?image=6

After office on Thursday, we went to Abu Dhabi hoping to catch Beyonce's live performance in Abu Dhabi's F1 Grand Prix. Unfortunately, we were already late and only arrived for the last couple of songs. We went home so late and had to get up early on Saturday to bring the Lara couple to the airport.

At quarter before twelve on Friday, I went to the airport to pick up Niko who just came back from the Philippines. I had to be the one to pick him up since Karl was busy on the setup of his event at 360 later that night.

Karl was able to come home at around 2pm, we had lunch and prepared to leave at 4pm. The car was full with all of us ready to go to 360. The view was exhilarating. You can't get any closer to the Burj Al Arab and teaming up with a nice weather, it was perfect.

The only hitch though, all of us are not into partying that much and no one was drinking. We had to leave at around 8pm to go to Madinat Jumeirah and had dinner. When we came back to 360, it was only Val and I. The others decided to roam around Jumeirah Beach Hotel.

Then I had no choice but to meet and join Karl's boss, Steve with his wife with adidas executives Ellen, Eddy and his wife. We were all so tired and left the place at 1am already. It was a great weekend overall.