2009: A Look Back on the All-time Low

Yes, it's the end. While we are all hoping and praying for a better and brighter 2010, let's take a look back on 2009. I felt like I was on top of the world, not in its true sense and feeling, but like a god watching over everyone, replaying the past year in my mind.

Overall, I considered 2009 an all-time low. The start of the year was marred by the global financial crisis, with world-wide unemployment, bankruptcy, and instability everywhere that we have lived the year continuously tightening our belts. Then came a sort of "epidemic", the H1N1 virus that has affected hundreds of thousands worldwide. We have also lost several well-known names of the day, the King of Pop Michael Jackson, on top of the list.

And as if we weren't struggling enough just to be able to continue to survive, the Philippines was struck by several calamities, killer typhoons which killed numerous people and left thousand others homeless. There were massive barbaric killings that placed the country in the global headlines. 2009 was about to end and still, a volcano was threatening to explode and several thousands more were to spend Christmas in evacuation centers.

We now welcome 2010, filled with fervent hopes that it will promise a better and brighter days for everyone. Though the past year has been an absolute turmoil, we have to face the coming year with smiles in our hearts and pray that all our lucks will turn and finally favor us.

Great Expectations

When you've had great expectations, you start to think of a lot of possibilities. You imagine things you would want to happen, what you want to be. You dream about things and continuously think about it, how you would feel. But what happens when those expectations were not met? What happens when all those dreams burst out like bubbles?

Denial
It was the first thing I ever felt. Could there be some mistake? Was there some erroneous event that occurred? Were my eyes blinding me? For a moment, I paused and thought that it could not be true. Yet, eventually the truth sinks in and you start to feel other emotions.

Disappointment
When I have finally convinced myself that I am staring truth in the face, I felt disappointment. I felt disappointed that all my efforts have not been fruitful. I felt disappointed that a lot of people have counted on me and I felt that I have let them down. I felt disappointed feeling it was not worth it.

Regrets
Luckily, I didn't feel any regrets. I did not regret that I have not exerted more effort to achieve my desired outcome. I didn't have regrets for not spending more of my attention and time. I didn't feel any regrets that I have not given my best.

Acceptance
After some time and thoughts vent out on the negatives, I finally decided it was time to let go. There was no point in crying over spilled milk. The worst is over and done.

Moving On
I have to move on. There is no turning back. I have to face what lies ahead. There are many lessons learned here. And one thing that keeps a smile on my face is the fact that I bravely did it. Without anything on my sleeves but guts and faith, I have ran through the battle. I may have lost, but I was alive and ready to face more battles in the future.

The Blind Side

Teenager Michael Oher (Quinton Aaron) is surviving on his own, virtually homeless, when he is spotted on the street by Leigh Anne Tuohy (Sandra Bullock). Learning that the young man is one of her daughter's classmates, Leigh Anne insists that Michael—wearing shorts and a t-shirt in the dead of winter—come out of the cold. Without a moment's hesitation, she invites him to stay at the Tuohy home for the night. What starts out as a gesture of kindness turns into something more as Michael becomes part of the Tuohy family despite the differences in their backgrounds.

Living in his new environment, the teen faces a completely different set of challenges to overcome. And as the family helps Michael fulfill his potential, both on and off the football field, Michael's presence in the Tuohys' lives leads them to some insightful self-discoveries of their own.

Based on the best-selling novel by Michael Lewis, "The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game."

I really loved this movie, it has deeply touched my heart. It is one of those stories which gives inspiration and hope to everyone who sees it. No wonder the movie grabbed the top spot on the box office from Twilight Saga: New Moon. Though I don't particularly criticize New Moon, as I'm also a fanatic of Twilight Saga, I don't doubt that The Blind Side has more meat and value and truly inspiring family movie. It's a movie you would never tire of repeating over and over.

http://www.theblindsidemovie.com/

This Sh*t Called Life

Life is so hard. Sometimes you just feel you've had enough. Sometimes you feel like not wanting to wake up. Everything hurts. Everywhere are problems. Sometimes you feel like all the weight of the world is upon your shoulders. And you have no strength to carry on. Sometimes you just wish it would all end. There is no escape. How to go on?

Sometimes it feels like you are awake but feel dead on the inside. Sometimes you feel that your body is nothing but an empty shell. You laugh, you go along with your everyday life, but deep inside you are torn apart. How to will you heal?

Sometimes you feel like the world is playing a painful joke on you. Sometimes you wonder why everyone around you seems fine and you are not. Sometimes you just wish it would all stop. So you will stop hurting. How will it stop?

Sometimes you think that you will not have to think at all...

Catching Up

There are a lot of things that I wanted to blog about these past few weeks but I haven't got time to do so and so here I am to do a little catching up. Firstly, I was finally able to announce to the whole world that I am becoming a mom and I was overwhelmed by the raining congratulations and greetings.

Then I was busy during the last weeks of November since my exams are fast approaching. Though I didn't force myself to study too hard, even if I had, I won't be able to. I went to Abu Dhabi on December 1 and before that, we had some holidays. On November 27, we went to Oman to go fishing. It was a long and tiring day eventhough I didn't fish myself. The next couple of days were devoted to cd burning. I took the side job from Karl and finished the day before my scheduled departure for Abu Dhabi.

On December 1, I drove all the way to Abu Dhabi. I was so amazed with myself that I was able to do it without any hassles. The registration for the exam was mostly waiting and walking and by the time we went to the hotel I was too exhausted. I took a quick nap and ate dinner afterwards. Then we tried to peruse our notes.

I didn't know if it was nerves or what but I didn't sleep well that night. The day of the exam arrived. I woke up at five in the morning and prepared. We just walked our way to the school and waited for the examiners. I was astonished and relieved that the day just went by like that. I was finally halfway through the entire exams.

The second and final day of the exam went smoothly as the first. I was one of the firsts to finish at three in the afternoon. At around four, I was driving back home. It was not quite a long drive but exhaustion finally overtook me when I reached home.

I stayed at home for the rest of the weekend until I finally went back to work on the 7th of December.